Welcome back Murphy!

1. Birds of a feather flock together ... and crap on your car.

2. There's always a lot to be thankful for if you take time to lookfor it. For example, I am sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt.

3. When I'm feeling down, I like to whistle. It makes the neighbor's dog run to the end of his chain and gag himself.

4. If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.

5. Don't assume malice for what stupidity can explain.

6. A penny saved is a government oversight.

7. The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right time, but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.

8. The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat are really good friends.

9. The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.

10. He who hesitates is probably right.

11. If you think there is good in everybody, you haven't met everybody.

12. If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.

13. The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.

14. Did you ever notice: When you put together "THE" and "IRS," it spells "THEIRS.

Would you really be surprised?

"The meeting of the clairvoyant society has been cancelled due to unforseen circumstances."--Author unknown

CURSE YOU LATE NIGHT FLIGHTS!

Currently reading: Heaven by Randy Alcorn

Okay, it's 11:00 P.M., I want to go to bed, but I have to leave soon to pick my brother up at the airport in St. Louis because his plane doesn't come in until 12:20 in the morning! Ugh! We're going to be leaving soon, but I just thought I'd give my input about that.

Me at the age of four or five

Well, a person or two kept begging me to change my Facebook picture because they couldn't stand the sight of my demon cat. What do you think of the new one?

SNOW and CHRISTMAS!!!

Well everyone, I don't know about where you are, but those of us in the Midwestern U.S. just got A BUNCH of snow this past week! That makes me extremely happy, let me tell you. Mind you, most of it is melted away now, but I made sure to go outside and photograph the house after it happened, as well as the rest of the street.

On top of the snow, CHRISTMAS is coming! Therefore we've got the inside of our house all decked out for it, and this is our living room. Just so you know, we did have the fireplace turned on for the picture that shows it. The fire just wouldn't show up in the picture.

In addition to getting the Christmas decorations up, the church Christmas pageant was this weekend, and this year it was a type of musical/cantata called Wondrous Gift. It was really good, and really did a great job at focusing on the reason for Christmas: Jesus! Praise God for this wonderful gift of salvation that He brings this Christmas!

More from Alton and Elsah

This is the view one has of the Mississippi River from a small parking lot at the entrance to Elsah where you can park so that you can just walk around the village:

Then, upon entering Elsah, this house is the first this one sees on the left:

As you drive on by, you'll see this on your left:

And this will be on your right:

Keep walking, and you'll find the Corner Nest Bed & Breakfast on your left:

Here's an example of one of the street signs used in Elsah. Also notice just one of the many beautiful houses in the background that makes you fall in love with the little village.

Here are just some more examples of what you see walking along Mill Street in Elsah.

After that, you come upon the Green Tree Inn, now up for sale. I would love for a friend to buy it and give me a few free nights each year though.;)

You also come upon this house which my family and I toured during an open house when we first moved to Illinois. It was pretty expensive though. When we toured it in 1996 or 1997, it was well over $200,000, which means with inflation, it's probably around $300,000-$500,000 now, maybe even more! It was a beautiful home, inside and out, built in the 19th century (sorry friends in Europe, but for the U.S., that's old). Plus, it's got a neat old garage in back with an apartment over it!

If you keep walking, there will be a place to buy wagons and buggies, now closed for a good long time. They may still use it for village civic activities or as a museum or something. I'm not sure.

You keep walking and see another beautiful cottage on your left.

You soon make a left after this and go over a quaint little bridge to find the Methodist church on your right across the street. Although you can't tell in this picture, the church has an adorable little mailbox that looks quite similar to the church on the church lawn.

You then continue on down the road and find the village hall on your left. Sorry, but there was just no way that I could get that power/telephone/whatever it's for line out of the picture.

You then continue on to find a little dessert restaurant on your left called My Just Desserts. I've never been there, but it's been featured a few times lately on the local morning show, Show Me St. Louis. I'm just dying to try it out sometime! There's this one in Elsah and another one in Alton. Across the street in the little building with the roof which hangs out over the entrance is the Christian Science Reading Room. This wouldn't seem so significant unless you've ever been to Elsah and realized that the vast majority of the population is Christian Scientist due to the only Christian Science college/university (for those in other countries, they're the same thing in the U.S. except for size) in the world (Principia College) being up a little side road about a mile or two. I would say that most of the traffic I saw going through Elsah that evening was heading to or from Principia in the white numbered vehicles they use to escort students around in. If you ever decide to visit Elsah, the campus is beautiful to drive around with some absolutely amazing buildings, and an incredible chapel, but be warned that you're being watched THE WHOLE TIME! Leaving your car is not allowed, you're only allowed on campus 10-15 minutes total, and if you drive off the tour path at all (as I accidentally once did), and official will instantly pop out and redirect you (as friendly as possible) in the right direction. When you get back to the front gate, they will also know that you accidentally got off the beaten path. It's pretty big brotherish. A beautiful drive just the same though. Thus being said, it's probably no big surprise that Elsah is such a small village, as the mortality rate in a religion which doesn't allow doctors would probably keep the town from growing much.

And to conclude my little photo tour of Elsah, Illinois, here's a picture of another bed and breakfast in town.

And that's the conclusion of my little photo tour of Elsah! I hope you all enjoyed it! Mind you, there were some pictures that I didn't get which I wish I could have, but that's just another reason to go back, huh?

More pictures from Alton and Elsah

Well, I'm only extremely behind on updating my blog, aren't I? Haha! Anyway, I thought I'd go ahead and get some more pictures from my trip to Alton and Elsah posted. I hope you enjoy them!

This is a staircase in the park in Alton. I don't know why, but ever since we first went to this park when I was in 8th Grade, I have loved this staircase and made a tradition of going down and then back up every time we go. This time I went down and came back up twice!

There are also some cool houses in the area of the park in Alton. While much of Alton is skanky and ghetto, the houses by the park are very beautiful, having an expensive view of the river.

Now, I'll go ahead and end this post here and pick the next one up in Elsah.

American High School Analogies

These are actual analogies and metaphors found in high school essays.

- John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.

- He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant and she was the East River.

- Even in his last years, grandpappy had a mind like a steel trap, only one that had been left out so long, it had rusted shut.

- Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.

- The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.

- The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.

- He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame. Maybe from stepping on a landmine or something.

- The Ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.

- It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids with power tools.

- He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.

- Her eyes were like limpid pools, only they had forgotten to put in any pH cleanser.

- She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs.

- Her voice had that tense grating quality, like a generation thermal paper fax machine that needed a band tightening.

- It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to the wall.

The pastor agrees to drink!

Okay, now I know that I really can be a preacher, so long as I can keep employing these kinds of tactics:

A Baptist preacher went to visit a member of the community and invited him to come to church Sunday morning. It seems that this man was a producer of fine peach brandy, and told the preacher that he would attend his church IF the pastor would drink some of his brandy and admit doing so in front of his congregation. The preacher agreed and drank up.

Sunday morning the man visited the church. The preacher recognized the man from the pulpit and said:

"I see Mr. Johnson is here with us this morning. I want to thank him publicly for his hospitality this week and especially for the peaches he gave me and the spirit in which they were given."

Delivery!

There was an unexpected knock on my door, and like I always do I first opened the peephole and asked, "Who's there?"

"Parcel post, ma'am. I have a package that needs a signature."

"Where's the package?" I asked suspiciously. The deliveryman held it up.

"Could I see some ID?" I said, still not convinced.

"Lady," he replied wearily, "if I wanted to break into your house, I'd probably just use these," and he pulled out the keys I had left in the door.